Sep 8, 2010


Life right now is weird to say the least. Finally, though I never would have found it possible, I’ve found Mel... The job is as stable as ever, and life overall is good. I told her about my feelings last week, n guess what she didn’t say no!!!
We talk everyday – nearly. Though it is frankly, not enough Somehow it feels like I am trying to live a lifetime in a small moment. I have always got this feeling of a major paradigm shift a foreboding that anything could go wrong at any time.
I try to be in control, but its getting harder.  Something is fishy in this situation, as in my life till today a feeling that I was being orchestrated has followed me where ever I go. Times like these I miss her the most. My thoughts race back to the times all those years back that I spent lying in her bed, in her arms or on her lap.
On the other hand, there is the fact that my career is on the right track, so is my love life; my finances are stable and so are the people around me. I should be happy, but I am not. Satisfied, but I never am. Stable, but that seems to be a distant realm of some parallel universe. I am living a dual life, where good and bad times have actually become a single point of congruence, the same side of the same coin. I feel like a third person observing myself from a distance. What I can see is essentially good, but it is not what I am, it is not where I want to be..
 Something is always missing. 

I’m flying and i won’t come down...
Theres nobody who can mess me around....
I’m high on wings of fire... going ever higher
I know what I want, I know where to go n I am goin there now

Don’t mess with me, u can’t win
Don’t even try, or you’ll be busted in
I’m ready, but do u know whats inside me,
Push me too far, and you’ll see…


Anonymous said...

its an amazin one......keep it up.... :)